Empanadas Por Favore

Spanish, I don't speak it, but I can eat it like a pro so I attempt to speak it when in the presence of the food and it never gets offended if I mis-pronounce things or just put e's on the end of words (porke, mushroome..you get the picture e). And if it does, I'm about to eat it which is the ultimate diss...
I made empanadas and I will say, they were supere awesomee. So I'm going to share my recipe/process with you...
Things you'll need...

Empanada wrappers 10 or so...( you can buy them, Goya makes them or here's the recipe for home-made) (but you're not better than me if you make them yourself just so you know...you're not)
1 lb ground pork or chicken or beef Whatever you want (I used pork)
1 Portabella mushroom
3 cloves garlic (less or more, I love garlic so..)
1 white onion
2 tablespoons olive oil
2 tablespoons soy/teriyaki sauce (I know it's not spanish but it's GOOD trust me)
Salt to taste
Pepper to taste
Red Chili peppers to taste (or chili powder)
Cooking oil for frying

SO...brown the meat in a pan until it's totally cooked. In the meantime chop your onion, garlic, mushroom and mix together in a bowl. Add your spices/sauce and mix together.I chopped the SHIT out of that mushroom.
Once the meat is cooked take it out of the pan and set aside in a bowl. Add 2 tablespoons olive oil and all the veggies/spices. Cook those babies up until they're, um, cooked? it's about 8-10 minutes.
Now add your meat to the veggie mixture and mix it up like an empanada filling party.
Lay out your empanada dough circles and glob about 2 large spoonfulls into the center. Fold that sucker over and make a little half circle pouch of friendship.
I pressed the edges down with a fork to trick my friends into thinking I'm fancy (by friends I mean Chloe, she wasn't impressed). I froze a bunch for later use, but the amount of dough I had was perfect for the amount of filling I had (because I'm a culinary master).
Final step is to fry them. I'm scared of being blinded by flying oil, and so should you so use a large pot and fill it about 1 1/2" worth of oil. Over medium heat pop those babies in the oil and it takes max 1 minute (30 secs on each side). Basically until they're a golden brown..."Gracias por las empanadas amable señora"
"De Nada...de nada"

What I did Instead of the Gym

I set a goal to go the gym everyday this week. Which usually turns into 2 or 3 (or 1) times a week. Monday I went but now I'm getting a cold so any excuse I can find I'll take it. Like last night! I'm on my way to the gym (already have my running shoes on)...Pure sass.

and I get a call from my friend Gabe (Gay Gabe specifically...or Gayby) and he's like, "drinks?" and I'm like, "YES"...Gym was really pissed at me but I was all,Gym got the picture....
We went to Crocodile Lounge on the lower east side. For every drink you buy you get a personal pizza so...that's better than sweating my "B" off for sure. Right?...Are you there Pizza it's me Anna?

fender DESTROYER

Look at this car wreck!HOW? you ask, "was everyone ok?" NO idea. There were ambulances but they didn't have anyone in them (I peaked, sue me). There were just a bunch of neighbors standing around but they were just there to survey the aftermath. I chose this photo because of the beaming sunlight illuminating the scene, as if GOD's looking down and saying, "my B!"...everyone makes mistakes G we'll let it go this time...

Hoboken "You're Jokin'"

So I went to Hoboken on Friday for my friend Britney's birthday. She recently had foot surgery so she was one cruches...In case you don't know what crutches look like?
Anyways, the Path. I personally don't think highly of New Jersey, specifically it's residents, sorry I'm not sorry. BUT...this one event might have swayed my view. My friend had gone directly to happy hour after work (she gets out at three on Fridays) we met at "the Path" around 9:30. She was pretty drunk.
We get off at our stop in Hoboken and my phone starts Vibin' and it's Kara. I'm like, "look ya drunk beez your phone is calling me from your purse" and she's like, "nope, it's not here"...
Someone on the train had given her phone to the train conductor who called me. He delayed the train to bring it to us outside the station...What a gem.
Then we celebrated...so attractive

Gotham On a Thursday Night

Last night was a weiiird night. First off, 5,000 degrees in my apartment and, I watched the finale of Gordon Ramsey's Best Restaurant and my fav didn't win (shout out to Prashad!). Needless to say I needed a cold one and I needed it fast.
So where do you go when you live in Bushwick and you can't manage to make it to Williamsburg to pay $5,000 (my new favorite exaggeration number) for a PBR? GOTHAM, that's where. It's a comic book/action figure themed bar that serves $2 PBR's that you can add a shot to for $3...I also live extremely close to it which makes it IDEAL for crawling home.
They have a PROJECTOR! so you can watch MOVIES. Last night they played Kick Ass which I had never seen but it almost made me cry even though there was no sound.
One last thing that made this night weird/great. When my room mate and I show up there's two other people there. They leave shortly after we arrive which means we were the only people there! we got to dance by ourselves which made the bar tender super uncomfortable...doesn't make sense because our dance moves are AMAZ.

Later more people showed up but by then I had had $14 worth of PBR's and was ready to pass out under my air conditioner.
Go to Gotham.

Laundry mat...?

I have never done laundry in a laundromat....(also I thought it was "laundry mat" until I just googled it)
sorry?
whatever, I did it last night, there's one across the street from my apartment so from my room mate's window I can see when it's done!...MAGIC.
Everything worked out, my stuff didn't get stolen which is what I was worried about. I worked up a mighty sweat folding it out of the dryer which is nothing new. One thing that confused me was the guys doing the laundry that had been dropped off...they touch your underwear?
I'm not a germaphobey freak but I don't think I'd like the laundry folder and his son (a young boy cough child labor) touching what touches my booty...and other stuff. Like I can afford to drop off my laundry anyways, rich people problems.
On another note Hispanic game shows are confusing and overwhelming and don't bring your infant to a hotasshit "laundromat" and then get mad when it cries.
my Monday night hangout

Day, more than I can count

I've lived in Bushwick for two years now and after e-mailing my family a few lovely stories of my adventures and getting a nice response I've decided to blogaboutit. Tell you all about my life here in BK...because it's pretty cool/scary/you don't know if it's dog or human poop.

To start: I Just moved to a new place with my room mate Keturah who I knew from school and her dog Chloe who happens to have only one eye...see below. Don't bring it up if you ever meet her she doesn't know and don't have the heart to tell her.

She's showing you her good eye...

To Middle: Keturah found a waterbug in her room yesterday and had a very dramatic reaction which included shrill screams and slapping it with a broom. Sorry downstairs neighbors. She also fell off the stool that she was kneeling on. Waterbug is a nice word for cockroach...SICK.
To End: That photo totally grosses me out...Maybe I can make it more pleasant?...
YUP sexy...I'm off to cuddle with this hotty